~ Homeless...~

Have you ever been homeless?

Personally I have not ever resided in a box...bridge...tent set up on the side of a highway. Can't say I've had that experience. But recently....seriously....

So this is life at the moment.

This is what a massive amount of my day is spent doing. Commuting. New job is way on the west side....like WAY....the address is not even in the city that it nestles beside. Cause as you've read, I work on the reserve. Reserve doesn't have the same address as city dwellers. So this alone is an hour drive from current residence. Add in the car pooling...which ads another 1/2 hour to a one way trip. So if you're good at math, which I am not...that's why I'm in a numbers job....that's 3 hours of driving per day.

(start to cry with frusteration)

Three hours!!!

Now if you've met me....you've seen me, you know I take a slight amount of pride in looking like I put some amount of effort into my appearance. Showing up at work like I've just returned from running the Sahara on a three legged camel is not what I usually aim for. Now, I have to pat myself on the back. I have gotten said morning routine down to an hour. Okay....that's a bit overstated....but I can definately get it down to and hour + 15. The time clock at job is 8am...(there's no time clock, I don't work at a warehouse)...(there is however, an unspoken competition on who can get to the office first...this competition being between myself and the two guys who I work with...they don't like to lose to a girl...especially a white one) So...8 am start to the morning....one hour of driving....1.25 hr primp session. We're down to alarm going off at 5:45. Now this is making a VAST assumption that I exit my slumber when the alarm goes off. (eye roll and sigh) PU.....lease! Who really does that?!?! Who REALLY gets up every single morning, yawns and stretches and bounces out all happy and Thumper-like to get on with the day...exactly when the alarm goes off?? NO ONE!!

What really happens? Alarm goes off. Hit snooze. Now you've already calculated in your head how many times you'll likely hit the snozze button...therefore setting the alarm earlier to accomodate. It would seem logical that rather than setting it earlier and hitting it three times, thus intereruppting the prescious amount of sleep available. You'd set it for the exact time you need to rise...get that extra 20-30 min of solid sleep. But no, you play games with your own head. Think you're tricking yourself. Its a sad sad story of ploy and deception...that you are the star of. So now alarm is going of around 5:15-5:20. That's way to freakin' early. Like....WAY! (picture Tori Spelling)

I read an article....well glanced at it while standing in line to get milk...that if you get 8 hours of sleep...you'll lose weight. So hey, that is the golden reason to sleep. Not for the re-energizing of the body, the re-set of the electrical system that governs the brain and subsequent responses...it's about weight loss. So...I need 8 hours. That would mean I have to go to bed at 9:15. Which means actually starting the sleeping process around 8-8:30. Cause there's the teeth brushing, the face washing, the Facebook checking to see if anyone has updated lately, the dishwasher starting, thinking about tomorrows outfit, lunch making (ya right, that's way to proactive and organized). There's the door locking so the robbers don't get you, the email checking, the weather checking to make sure planned outfit will work. This is all before actually inhabbiting the bed.

Then the tossing, the turning, the stressing, the thinking, planning, over thinking, leg ache, headache....forgot to pee.

So really I need to start the process like 7:30.

Well, that would be all fine and great...but stop time at said job is around 4:30. But carpooling likely makes that ending time closer to 5-5:30. Then the commute home. We're at 6, if we're lucky. Then the making of dinner, eating of the dinner....possible clean up of dinner. We're at 7...

Do you see where this is going?!?#$!^!#???

I need to live closer to work.

Homelessness Part Deux

Current residence is in a small town east of the big bad city. It's fine, I like it...my kids are there...I need to be close to them.

But it adds to all of the above.

So new town I want to be a resident of. Also outside of BBC...way closer to work, love everything about it. Farther from kids...but I'll work that out.

No one will let me live there.

Now, Main Man D will tell you that I don't take well to being bossed around. Blame my mother, she made me take care of my siblings... I am always the boss.

So I don't like being told no. Especially when the reasons are idiotic.

I work. I work in a permanent solid position. I contract through a company I've owned and operated for 10 years. Yes, it's true that this is the first year I've done this work on a full time basis...but I gave you the name and number of the employer to contact. He'll tell you the situation. We have an agreement. With details of agreement.

Carpooling partner also works. Also is in a permanent position. BUT, also contracts on a self employment type situation. She didn't like this. Didn't like the all income was from self employed sources.

No, she'd rather let those that have lower, unsubstancial, temporary to partly serious income. That work shifts that are unpredictable, party on the weekend, don't water the lawn, let their cars sit on the drive way in half deconstruced manner, until their rust into the concrete. Complain constantly about stupid stuff, make late payments....own a rottweiler. This seems like a logical choice.

I'm not bitter.

I made the mistake of wanting it. Of thinking the new residence was a definate step in the right direction. Bigger, better.... Don't fall in like something that isn't signed off on. It saves you from being bitter.

So back to square one. Can stay where I'm at. That's not a problem. But the above is taking a toll on my sanity, and will soon take on my health.

Happy Monday... well not for me cause I've been up since 5:15.

Less bitterness tomorrow....maybe, not likely...but here's hoping.