May 12, 2009

~ Sporty Girl ~

Miss S is a volleyball player. Or at least putting the effort in to become one.

Serious concentration and determination....
That didn't last long....
Cause let's face it....volleyball can't be exciting all the time.

~ Mom's Day ~

Mom's Day was spent outside, havin' fun....throwing rocks, sticks, leaves, garbage, brother, anything that could be removed from one place and thrown into the water. All had fun, all got wet in one form or another. The big man didn't come....the little men did. The princess got her ears pierced the day before...and made sure that every one knew it.
A great day with the kids.

May 5, 2009

~ Sound Medical Advice ~

Q: Doctor, I've heard that cardiovascular exercise can prolong life. Is this true?

A: Your heart is only good for so many beats, and that's it... don't waste them on exercise. Everything wears out eventually. Speeding up your heart will not make you live longer; that's like saying you can extend the life of your car by driving it faster. Want to live longer? Take a nap.

Q: Should I cut down on meat and eat more fruits and vegetables?

A: You must grasp logistical efficiencies. What does a cow eat? Hay and corn. And what are these? Vegetables. So a steak is nothing more than an efficient mechanism of delivering vegetables to your system. Need grain? Eat chicken. Beef is also a good source of field grass (green leafy vegetable). And a pork chop can give you 100% of your recommended daily allowance of vegetable products.

Q: Should I reduce my alcohol intake?

A: No, not at all. Wine is made from fruit. Brandy is distilled wine, that means they take the water out of the fruity bit so you get even more of the goodness that way. Beer is also made out of grain. Bottoms up!

Q: How can I calculate my body/fat ratio?

A: Well, if you have a body and you have fat, your ratio is one to one. If you have two bodies, your ratio is two to one, etc.

Q: What are some of the advantages of participating in a regular exercise program?

A: Can't think of a single one, sorry. My philosophy is: No Pain...Good!

Q: Aren't fried foods bad for you?

A: YOU'RE NOT LISTENING!!! ..... Foods are fried these days in vegetable oil. In fact, they're permeated in it. How could getting more vegetables be bad for you?

Q: Will sit-ups help prevent me from getting a little soft around the middle?

A: Definitely not! When you exercise a muscle, it gets bigger. You should only be doing sit-ups if you want a bigger stomach.

Q: Is chocolate bad for me?

A: Are you crazy? HELLO Cocoa beans ! Another vegetable!!! It's the best feel-good food around!

Q: Is swimming good for your figure?

A: If swimming is good for your figure, explain whales to me.

Q: Is getting in-shape important for my lifestyle?

A: Hey! 'Round' is a shape!

Well, I hope this has cleared up any misconceptions you may have had about food and diets. And remember: 'Life should NOT be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in an attractive and well preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways - Chardonnay in one hand - chocolate in the other - body thoroughly used up, totally worn out and screaming 'WOO HOO, What a Ride'

AND.....For those of you who watch what you eat, here's the final word on nutrition and health. It's a relief to know the truth after all those conflicting nutritional studies.

1. The Japanese eat very little fat and suffer fewer heart attacks than Americans.

2. The Mexicans eat a lot of fat and suffer fewer heart attacks than Americans.

3. The Chinese drink very little red wine and suffer fewer heart attacks than Americans.

4. The Italians drink a lot of red wine and suffer fewer heart attacks than Americans.

5. The Germans drink a lot of beers and eat lots of sausages and fats and suffer fewer heart attacks than Americans.

CONCLUSION Eat and drink what you like. Speaking English is apparently what kills you.

May 4, 2009

~ Crazy ~

While out enjoying the beautiful weekend, we met two guys. Two guys who had big kayaks, and were dressed head to toe in protective gear. Not safety protective, but cold protective. See, these guys thought that it would be a good idea to throw themselves off the side of a cliff into freezing glacier know, for fun.

They drew quite a crowd as they analyzed the waters, planned the drop....tested their theories. Then suited up, hugged each other in case this was the last time moment they'd be alive. Then shot themselves off the water fall. The first guy did an impressive fall that ended with him upside down, while strapped to his kayak. That was a little nerve racking...but he freed himself at last to the applause of the impromptu fans. The second guy topped him by also making an impressive drop and staying up right. All breathed a sigh of relief. Cause none of us wanted to jump in to save them, glacier fed waters.......freezy.

We spoke to them after their death defying leap. This was their first try going over a water fall, and only the 4th time kayaking. Pretty steep learning curve.

I'm an adventurous girl....not one to shy away from a challenge....but, thanks.

May 1, 2009

~ You HAVEN'T got Mail ~

Is email ruling your life?

I didn't think I was an email junkie...take it or leave it...that's me. I mean, I enjoy a good laugh from the endless amount of stuff that people send me. I also use it for work, mostly to avoid speaking to people. I have clients I haven't seen or actually spoken to in years.... all email.

So I'm not addicted or anything....

That is....

Unless the email isn't working!!

Are you supposed to be in the fetal position on the floor shaking when this happens?