Apr 24, 2008

~ Count down to Regina ~

I saw this on another blog, thought it was cute.

We're leaving for Regina tonight. 'We' being S and myself with my parents. Why are we going to Regina? Of all the places to visit....why Regina? = ) Because my brother and his family live there and his daughter is being baptised this weekend. His daughter and my daughter are only 2 weeks apart, and they haven't seen each other in 5 months, so we're going on a road trip.
I have a gazillion and one things to accomplish today, here's how it went down.
6 am - woke up with B's alarm. Thought about getting up, thought about how time productive it would be to get up and get this busy day started, kept thinking about getting up.
7:30 - got up.
8:15 - got two children out the door to school.
8:20 - ate my morning oatmeal and read how coyotes are eating school children - lovely.
8:30 - got on my computer and did my morning ritual, banking, emailing, blogging.
9:00 - Mr J woke up.
9:01 - changed a yucky, yucky bum.
9:15 - stood and looked at the kitchen and wondered if it would clean itself.
9:16 - decided it wouldn't and loaded the dishwasher.
9:20 - decided to blog about my day as it went along, cause that would definitely be time effective to stop after every task and go to my computer and write about it.
9:30 - showered two dirty boys. Could have bathed them, but that would have taken too long and got them too clean = ). Showers it is.
10 - Boys moderately clean and dressed, load of laundry in, dishwasher started. Packing started...opened bag that S has had packed for two weeks waiting for this day to arrive. Took everything out, she didn't pack underwear or shirts, that may have been a problem.
10:30 - Talk to D, good choice, you rock.
11:00 - Shower, by myself even....wow!
12: - Dressed, hair done (why can so much less hair still take so long)
12:30 - O to preschool.
12:45 - 1:30 - work in clients office while J watches a movie in the van.
1:30 - Drop of recycling, dollar store, Walmart.
2:15 - Do payroll for another client
2:45 - Pick up O.
2:50 - More packing
3:00 - More payroll
3:15 - Talk to K
Okay, that's it. I don't have time to keep this up.
Will update on the exciting trip to the Metropolis of Regina.

Apr 22, 2008

~ Migraine ~

Do you get migraines? I do. Not often, but often enough. The worst thing is I don't know when they'll hit. I can go months with nothing, and then be lambasted and be out for the count. Interesting to note that I didn't have a single problem until I got married. Just a tidbit of info there. So last night I got hit with a whammy. I shouldn't be surprised because I was pretty tired. I was rehearsing my role as an insomniac the night before. One reason I get the migraines is sleep deprivation. I was told this by a nice acupuncturist that said I really should have a nap everyday. OMGosh lady, you don't have a clue.

I was already feeling a little off...mostly thinking I just needed to stop burning the candle at both ends, trying to get all the work done so my trips can begin, trying to also app rear to be some sort of homemaker (ha ha) and mother ( double ha ha) at the same time. So I lay down for a minute and whammo. The visual disturbances. That's what the migraine people call them. For me, I call them the 'squiggly lines in my vision'. Those don't hurt. What they do mean is that for some reason the blood vessels in my head have constricted and so my blood pressure has gone up trying to push the blood through my brain. Great. So this is the start. I can't see and I know what's coming. When the visual disturbances work their way out of my sight, then the pain begins. I find that it's worse when it's been a while since that last episode. Thus the case last night. I haven't had a problem in quite a few months. So I'm nauseous, blind, can't stand the noise or light and have a knife stabbing into my eye. All very fun activities. One high point was that when B went to pick up pizza for our once a month pizza night on Friday, he was told they no longer took Amex. And because this once a month pizza night is charged to B's company, for which the company card is Amex, this was irritating. So he went online and complained. As a result we got a free pizza meal. So.....after all that explanation....the short of it is, I didn't have to worry about diner cause he was bringing it home.

So I'm laying there in pain. What's also interesting about my migraines is that I can't speak very well. I know everyone is shocked and amazed by that. Due to this B became concerned a few years ago and I had to start a bunch of tests to see if I was prone to get a stroke. I was not. It's like the words are in my head but my mouth doesn't understand. Jabber just comes out. It's dangerous because if I get a migraine when I'm not home, it's very hard for me to communicate what I need. I literally cannot get my mouth to say what my brain is pushing through. And when I'm having bad ones, I can't remember all the words. I watched a guy rehabilitate through a brain injury once. It was the same. He logically knew what the word should be, what it did and looked like and even felt like...but his brain could not come up with the actual word. It's weird...and scary. So that was my evening. Sleeping it off. That's all that does it. Medication doesn't touch it, I can't eat, can't watch TV, have to be in total darkness. It's a fun fun time. Plus I find that the pain of pressing really hard on the pressure points on my head is a better pain than the migraine, so I'm smashing my head with my hands. I have discovered that caffeine makes the time between headaches longer. Bring on the coffee. oh, wait...people read this and think that everything is say is etched in stone. I don't really drink coffee, I take a multi vitamin with green tea in it. It's enough caffeine to stave off my headache, but not buzz me. Better?!! Though I LOVE the smell of coffee and go wild for mocha flavored anything. I think medicinal coffee consumption should be allowed. = )

Alright, that's enough about that. I'm not quite 100% today, but much better. And I should be fine now. Better be. As you see by the countdown, the big road trip is coming fast and I'm not missing it.

Started up my new Enrichment site. See link on the sidebar. I have to be very nice and politically correct on this blog though, so unlike myself. So it's purely info, not fun.

1. S made an Inuksuk in school this week. I think this is an odd thing. Piled up rocks. That's really all it is. I understand the historical bit....ya da da. But still, piled up rocks. She and B were out in the back alley looking for the perfect rocks to stack. She wouldn't go back there on her own because she may get attacked. Dogs, bugs...the wind...she though she'd be attacked.

2. Stupid stupid snow. Ya, so we need moisture. Then let it rain already. I'm fine with rain, it smells nice, gives a nice little light show....give you an excuse to curl up with a book and some hot chocolate. Snow just is depressing and makes all the mess of winter outwear emerge again, and give you a back ache....literally.

3. We are now a Lacrosse family. Ty took a small spring course on Lacrosse. No hitting, just learn to play the game. He loved it. So now he's in the actual Lacrosse League and we're about to live and breath it. We already had three practises last week. It's a short season, only just over two months. But wow. We've never been in a sport that requires such a commitment. Once a week is all we've experienced. He has two practises a week and two games every single Saturday. We're fine with that, but it's a lot. And what if I miss American Idol. Priorities people.

4. So he's hot, sweaty and stinky when he done. But he's most excited by his 'hockey hair'. I've let him grow his hair out a little. He's pretty jazzed about it. Usually I buzz the boys. Quick and short...that's what they got. He wanted to grow it out a little and that was fine. Then he told me he wanted hockey hair. That's not happening. But letting him have it a little longer will be fine. He gets the biggest kick out of how messy and sweaty it is when he takes off his helmet. Weird kid. Have you seen some of the hockey hair that these boys have. Especially when they wear their hats and look like that have an upside down mushroom on their head.

5. J has learned the word Mom. He says it constantly. Mom means....I want that, I'm awake now, I'm tired, I want a cup of juice, I'm hungry, pick me up, O is beating me up....anything. I've never heard of such a multi use word. But due to mommy radar and probably brain damage, I know what each 'mum' means. However, hearing it non stop is proving to try my patience. As I am regularly kind, loving and endlessly enduring (stop laughing). The cuteness of this new word lasted about a week. It has been more than a month now. The kid needs to move on. Preferably to the word DAD.

6. My children have always been fascinated by what shampoo looks like streaming out of the bottle down the drain. Whether they are in the shower or bath, they have all turned the shampoo upside down and slowly watched it squeeze out. Okay Rain Man. This proves to be a little pricey. I don't buy anything fabulous for their hair. Those 2 in 1 no name kid shampoo's....but really. Literally money is running down the drain. They think that fibbing will get them off the hook.

"O, are you dumping out the shampoo in there" (he isn't showering lately)

"No, its wasn't me mom, it was J".

First of all...J is sleeping and has been for a while, second it smells like a strawberry sundae in here. But he's adamant that it wasn't him...as he holds the empty shampoo bottle behind his naked skinny butt.

7. I apparently do not feed the before mentioned O enough. He'd had breakfast this morning as per usual. Then around 11 I go up to my room to find that he's gotten out a big bag of shredded cheese and dumped a huge pile on my carpet and is having a snack. First of all, I don't mind if they get their own snacks. I actually prefer it. I leave down the snacks that are allowable so they can reach them in the pantry. And from a very young age teach them that if you're hungry....there is the food, get it yourself. It's not quite as cold as that sounds, but you get the idea. So he was taking that information to heart and had decided that golden cheese was the answer to his craving. Cheese is dang expensive....so lets not only eat it by the handful, but dump it on the carpet too. I love my children, I love my children, I love my children.

8. "THE" Hockey game is tonight. Last chance, win it or you're out. Game 7. I should tape my husband. Those of you that know him, know what I'm talking about. He's this quiet laid back guy. Doesn't talk too much, very intelligent with all kinds of useful tidbits on China or Africa that I always need to know. But when his sport are on...he's a maniac. He puts on the jersey, yells at the TV, screams at the refs and basically makes a scene...ALL BY HIMSELF. None of his friends come over, he's down there grumbling and whooping and hollering all alone. He's jumping around and cheering them on. Criticizing their play and strategies....coaching like we're receiving the salary for it...and again, all alone. It's a sight to behold. I adore the guy, but chill out. It's JUST a hockey game. I don't think I'll say that too him tonight. I will if they win...if not, well that's a whole other type of temper tantrum.

9. Just made lasagna for dinner. This is 'special' lasagna. In other words I hide as much stuff as possible in it, slather it with cheese, and they don't even know. Tonight they're getting zucchini, flax and spinach surprise. They're funny. Whenever I sneak stuff in, rather than just being lazy and making in 'normally'...they ooh and ahh over how yummy it is. I laugh....totally lying to them when they ask what the green stuff is. "Oh that a new spice, keeping eating". What's the white stuff mom, ( I also put Ricotta cheese)...it's just cheese, eat up. B starts eyeing me...but knows it's best to just keep eating.
10. Screaming. I can hear O coming down the stairs screaming. Can I type fast enough before he gets here.....Nope.
"T called me a Stupid head"
That's it....time to go.

Apr 17, 2008

~ Judgements ~

Do you make judgements of others, I do....it's a natural thing to do. I would say that it's how we handle those judgements or how we voice them that is the real issue.

I've come to know that I have been judged from what people read on this blog. I find this amusing. Why? Isn't this blog my life, isn't what I say here the very core of who I am? Aren't opinions expressed and statements made all done with an officer standing beside me to ensure that they are all true and accurate. Don't I print out every entry and laminate it in my journal so that future posterity can read it and really know who I am.


There are a very small quantity of people in the world that really know me well. Know who I am and what I'm about....know what my personality is, what my values and goals are. Those people are the ones that read every entry and laugh and roll their eyes because they know me. Those are the people that I make every entry especially outrageous for. Like the entry about B being a rock star. Totally wrote that for J, who I knew would get a huge kick out thinking of B wearing eyeliner. And as I predicted...got an email from her expressing her enormous gratitude for the big laugh she got from that one. Seriously people...relax.

For the judgers.....well, "he who throws the first stone....."

Apr 13, 2008

~ Word is out ~

So new calling today. I've known about it for a couple weeks. But with Conference, I've had to keep it quiet. Nothing earth shattering or anything....just Enrichment Leader. I'm pretty excited about it. I've felt a lacking in the program since they changed it. Just couldn't quite understand the new direction. But I plan on making our Enrichments fantastic. Stay tuned for a new blog exclusively dedicated to my Ward Enrichment Activities.

1. D had her baby this week. Gotta say, so happy for her...but glad it wasn't me. My 'baby', if you can call the Truck that runs around our house by that term...is now 18 mo old and a crazy guy. He comes by his nickname 'Truck' as he's a solid boy. But D has a tiny little S now that is a pretty sweet guy. His siblings couldn't quite get why I'm kissing and loving him....he's not my baby. Well I've been waiting for him too, and my babies can fight back now...and he just smells so good. Doesn't make me want anymore, but sure nice to snuggle him.

2. The count down is on. Today is the 13th. I leave for a quick trip to visit Miss T in 11 days. Then back for two days and off on the big road trip with my gals. So much to do in the next 11 days. So many files to finish and file...so many more that will be late, cause people have to get their stuff to me sooner, and with all the paperwork intact....and possibly without gum, hair or dead flies contained in the file. However when I find cash, that's okay.

3. The city near here had a record dump of snow last week. Pretty funny, cause my quaint little town only 50k to the East got narry a flake. Ha ha....

4. This weekend my cottage, home, abode, residence and flat is getting all new windows installed on the main level. Pretty revved about this. The current panes....and they are pains....are not good. They provide constant air conditioning in the winter, and sauna quality heat in the summer. They have cracked and peeling wood....and lovely, also mold in places. They don't seal properly, thus the mold. So new windows all around. Cause I don't have enough going on with tax season, trips upcoming, life and a new calling....let's bring in construction guys and have them rip up my house for a couple days.

5. The man around here had a birthday yesterday. He's gettin closer and closer to 40....he turned 36. Wow!! I met this particular love fest when he was 22. Life's had it set of roller coaster rides, but mostly I'm pretty fond of him and all he has to offer. I think I'll keep him around a while.

6. Speaking of love fest. How is yours going? I have found in nearly 14 years of marriage (can you believe that? I thought only old people were married that long!!!!) that it just isn't the same from day to day. So many things contribute to this relationship. The stress and fun of life, the strain and joy of raising our children, the aspects that money and jobs and all that provide. The foundation is there and always will be. Our committment is immovable. But basically whether or not I like him today, can change. I have to say that I'm pretty lucky, he is a low key guy that doesn't require a lot. Feed him, clothe him and 'you know what' every so often, and he's a happy camper. Well that would be the wrong term, he hates camping. What do you do to keep it fresh?

7. Old....are you old, I'm not old. I was telling my young cousin that's in college and only 19...that B was having his birthday this weekend. She was saying how she can't even image in being 36. Well I'm here to tell ya sista, when I was 19 I couldn't either. But 33 ain't lookin' too bad. And I would never want to go back 19 anyway. It's funny how the head is still the same....but the body...well....

A few questions on my list to ask my maker;

Who decided that the women would carry, bare and then nurse the babies. Do you understand what all that entails. It's all ouchy and I don't think that B's contribution to the process and mine are quite even.

Who thought it would be a good idea for the woman to put on 30+ pounds while carrying this joy and then spend the rest of her life trying to get it off?

Who decided that the 'nursers' would no longer stay in place after the precious joy is on the earth. And what's with the flattening...aren't they supposed to stay a shape that is NOT flatter?

Who decided that my hips would permanently be pushed farther part and stay that way, after baring the above mentioned 'joy'.

Who decided that the joy would then cost hundreds of thousands of dollars to feed, clothe, house, put in sports, shoes, bikes, electronics, hair products, and then provide and eductions for.

Who had the brilliant idea to let the daddy stay his same body weight for the entire process and then never be the one to be woke up every night by anyone of the previously mentioned 'joys'.

Who decided that these joys would be moody, go through unpleasant phases of mouthiness and would have serious Diva issues about what they wear to church?

Who decided that they would smell bad?

Just wondering, I would like a quiet word with this person, in a room with a door.

8. Hair. Do you have good hair? I have decent hair, but a lot of it. If I didn't have to do my hair, we might be able to sit on one of the soft benches at church, rather than the left over seats at the back. Why do girls with straight hair want curly, and curly girls wants straight. I spend a lot of time straightening out my hair. I cut a lot of it off a while back, and that has cut down on the time factor....but still. How much more would we be able to accomplish if we had great hair....all the time. It's the least we could be provide with, being that we've brought the 'joys' into this world.

9. Spring is upon us, and that means that shorts and capris are being considered. I have an order coming of shorts and capris that I hope are a hit. Why can't we have instant tans as soon as the whether gets warm and the legs being to appear? Cause the white pastiness is not enjoyable, but what's a girl do to?

10. Have you been watching American Idol. I PVR it and watch when I have two episodes taped. One with them all singing and then the next one where someone gets booted. I don't like the suspense. Who do you think will take it? I like David Cook. Got that whole rocker hunk thing goin'. Maybe I'll ask B is he wants to take up the electric guitar....and spike his hair and possibly and little eyeliner. (Those that know my darling love are falling off your chairs imagining the eyeliner I know....can you see it!!??!?!)

Later Gator.

Apr 7, 2008

~ 4 Years Old ~

Mr. O turned 4. And as is always the case, I am floored by how fast my children are growing up.

This particular man is light in our home. We didn't know about him early on. We were good. We had a boy and a girl...a perfect little family. Miss S was three and I was picturing the end if baby stages and phases, and a dreaming about full nights sleep.

There have been very few impressions in my life that have come as clearly as this one did. I remember exactly where I was...which happened to be turning from Anderson to North Deerfoot. I was on my way home. A thought came so clearly in my mind that I was nearly derailed.....time for another one. This came as a shock to me. I was calm with our thinking that two children was enough. I didn't feel the need to have more for any reason. We were healthy, happy and I was back in my jeans. Why mess with a good thing.

This is why...

Apr 1, 2008


She's 8....but whatever.

Rule One: If you pull into my driveway and honk you'd better be delivering a package, because you're sure not picking anything up.

Rule Two: You do not touch my daughter in front of me. You may glance at her, so long as you do not peer at anything below her neck. If you cannot keep your eyes or hands off my daughter's body, I will remove them.

Rule Three: I am aware that it is considered fashionable for boys your age to wear their trousers so loosely that they appear to be falling off their hips. Please don't take this as an insult, but you and all of your friends are complete idiots. Still, I want to be fair and open minded about this issue, so I propose this compromise: You may come to the door with your underwear showing and your pants ten sizes too big, and I will object. However, in order to ensure that your clothes do not, in fact, come off during the course of your date with my daughter, I will take my electric nail gun and fasten your trousers securely in place to your waist.

Rule Four: I'm sure you've been told that in today's world, sex without utilizing a "barrier method" of some kind will kill you. Let me elaborate: when it comes to sex, I am the barrier, and I will kill you.

Rule Five: In order for us to get to know each other, we should talk about sports, politics, and other issues of the day. Please do not do this. The only information I require from you is an indication of when you expect to have my daughter safely back at my house, and the only word I need from you on this subject is "early."

Rule Six: I have no doubt you are a popular fellow, with many opportunities to date other girls. This is fine with me as long as it is okay with my daughter. Otherwise, once you have gone out with my little girl, you will continue to date her until she is finished with you. If you make her cry, I will make you cry.

Rule Seven: As you stand in my front hallway, waiting for my daughter to appear, and more than an hour goes by, do not sigh and fidget. If you want to be on time for the movie, you should not be dating. My daughter is putting on her makeup, a process that can take longer than painting the Golden Gate Bridge. Instead of just standing there, why don't you do something useful, like changing the oil in my car?

Rule Eight: The following places are not appropriate for a date with my daughter: Places where there are beds, sofas, or anything softer than a wooden stool. Places where there are no parents, policemen, or nuns within eyesight. Places where there is darkness. Places where there is dancing, holding hands, or happiness. Places where the ambient temperature is warm enough to induce my daughter to wear shorts, tank tops, midriff T-shirts, or anything other than overalls, a sweater, and a goose down parka zipped up to her throat. Movies with a strong romance or sexual theme are to be avoided; movies which feature chain saws are okay. Hockey games are okay. Old folks homes are better.

Rule Nine: Do not lie to me. I may appear to be a potbellied, balding, middle-aged, dimwitted has-been. But on issues relating to my daughter, I am the all-knowing, merciless god of your universe. If I ask you where you are going and with whom, you have one chance to tell me the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth. I have a shotgun, a shovel, and five acres behind the house. Do not trifle with me.

Rule Ten: Be afraid. Be very afraid. It takes very little for me to mistake the sound of your car in the driveway for a chopper coming in over a rice paddy near Hanoi. When my Agent Orange starts acting up, the voices in my head frequently tell me to clean the guns as I wait for you to bring my daughter home. As soon as you pull into the driveway you should exit your car with both hands in plain sight. Speak the perimeter password, announce in a clear voice that you have brought my daughter home safely and early, then return to your car - there is no need for you to come inside. The camouflaged face at the window is mine.