The following are attributes that I require in a much needed therapist. If you feel you're up for the job, please let me know.
Kind
Loving
Gracious
Good Looking
Not prone to eye rolling
Or act shocked
Or judgemental
Willing to always take my side
Take my point as law
Congratulate me on all good decisions
Keep quiet about my bad decisions
Help me rationalize my behavior
Have a candy drawer
Have an 'in' at Bath & Body Works, and get me a discount
Compliment my style
Ask "Wow, who does your hair"
Not jerk awake after a particularly long session of me venting
Not show me their kids - because I don't care
Incessantly ask about my children and comment how beautiful they are
Ask about all the places I've travelled, and pay for my next trip
Always pay for lunch
Always go where I want to go, for lunch
Give me Costco gift cards
Oh, and listen to my struggles.
Applications are being accepted now.
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